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Stillbirth

and loss of the child in the period after birth

Pregnancy or childbirth does not always end the way we hope. Sometimes, the child may be lost in the later phase of pregnancy or during birth. Such cases are also referred to as a stillbirth. This experience can cause great sadness and can also be a burden for the partnership and for children who are already present or who will follow at a later stage. It is then important to say goodbye to the lost child and seek support.

If the baby shows no signs of life at birth and weighs at least 500g, it is referred to as a stillbirth. Stillbirth is the correct medical term. In this case, in the later phase of pregnancy, it is determined that the child is no longer alive in the womb. Or the child may die during childbirth. Lost children are referred to as star children.

Making decisions

Sometimes it is clear in advance that the birth will be a stillbirth. Prenatal examinations may show that the child is not viable after giving birth or will only be viable for a short time. This then presents those affected with difficult decisions: for example, whether the pregnancy should be terminated and the birth initiated early. 

You can also wait for the natural onset of childbirth. For this, the terms "carry further" or "palliative birth" are used. It is important to seek good advice in this case. In most cases, there is no acute health risk. The mother can then make a decision in peace. 

Seeking support

There is no right or wrong answer. Some people want to "act" as quickly as possible. Others want to experience the remaining pregnancy or the period shortly after giving birth. Advice and support from experienced people is particularly important during this time. It is also very helpful to organise support for the period that comes after before the stillbirth. In rare cases, a child may also die in the first days or weeks after birth. This may have already been announced. For example, premature birth or congenital diseases may be the reason.

In very rare cases, however, this also happens unexpectedly – such as in sudden infant death syndrome. Each of these situations is a very stressful experience for affected families. Good crisis and grief support is important and necessary.

Saying goodbye

Most parents find it difficult to say goodbye to their lost child. Sometimes it helps to welcome the child first. They may be touched or hugged. Some hospitals allow parents to bathe the deceased child and spend a little time with the them.

Mourning

A photo of the deceased child or a reminder box may also be important for the further course. There are specialised photographers who usually even work for free to assist with this. Rituals can also be helpful. Some hospitals offer a memorial service at a special burial place for star children. The children can officially be given a name and buried. 

There is also advice and special support. For example, grief counsellors, midwives or psychologists can provide support. They help people cope with the grief and to be able to deal with the pain and other feelings better in the long term. This isn't just important for the parents themselves, but for siblings too.

What happens next?

After the loss of a child, parents' fears of subsequent pregnancies are often particularly great. This can have a negative impact on the child. It is therefore very important to seek support at this time as well. As a result, the Frühe Hilfen (Early Intervention) programme can still be used for a period of time after a stillbirth. Or the Frühe Hilfen (Early Intervention) programme can help with your next pregnancy. In any case, exchanging ideas with other people affected in self-help groups can also be helpful.

You can find more information on the subject at the following links: